The last dying cord of an electric guitar has so much to give. Its slowly fading away into abyss reminds me of my past that slid away in the most subtle and non-explosive way yet it never failed to leave behind lasting marks of destruction in my soul.
The fading Mozart of memories that keep my soul dancing with
each string ... the smell in the air on
a bright day of summer vacations when you would be waiting for the sun to lower
down into the west so you could move out of your home and run in the fields
with other kids. Times when moving a mile away from home seemed many oceans
apart. Moments of dusky night falls and the relief on seeing the light emerging
from the front porch of your home reminding you of your nearness to the only
tiny world you were going to fall into again till it dawns.
The wasteful hours of school when you knew the only
protection you had, was your big
brothers hanging around for you. The naivety of walking arms around shoulders
with friends thinking it would go on and on forever. Or the scary delusional
figures hiding in your closet at sleep time and covering your head with blanket
was the best protection. The nights spent watching clear sky and actually finding
time to praise Lord for the beautiful diamonds hanging up there.
But things change,
for change they must, as life moves on. Relations you thought were your biggest
crutches in early days turn out to be nothing but ambiguous images of the
present. Friendships go into background or maybe buried deep under the dirt of
practicalities and livelihood!
The question that pops up in head is what kind of change can
be managed keeping the same guileless child of past stuck with life till we
die. Does life have to be that much practical that one forgets the tiny little
wonders that we were born with .The wonders of unconditional love, relations,
friendships or is life wicked enough to drain the very essence of selflessness
out of us?
I see people changing faces, paces and places. I've
witnessed men torn apart; succumbing to the very delusional practical life they
think they could have control over. Human mind is very vulnerable to
deceptions. It falls easily into foolishness, thinking it can see the basic
wide screen picture of what is yet to come and misses out on tiny details that
are deleted from the past. Those little changes prove to have disastrous
effects on our perception about friends and relations. Some say it’s called
'life goes on!'. Others fall into believing that it’s what defines how
pragmatic you are!
Past seems like a flash of a second and future seems never
ending! That’s how fiercely your mind falls into deluding games of time! So
when we make selfish morally ambivalent decisions in life we ignore the fact
that our mind and our life are ultimately being controlled by time. Thus the
decisions we make define how we perceive time!
The only way to keep our innocence and our generosity flourishing despite whatever life throws upon us, is by keeping ourselves clinging
to the fragments of our past! Our past memories enhance those tiny details of
purity of relations we think we have lost to the world of today and tomorrow.
Re-igniting the virtuous heart is hard but not impossible. We just have to
lower down the ego and admit how wrong we can be! We just have to give our soul
a benefit of doubt and our mind a reboot and start believing that life can
mature our minds but not the souls .The souls are the same ones that used to
lay on green grass and chat with friends for hours and hours, souls that never
hesitated crying or laughing in front of
the world, souls that flourished in the smell of fresh dew drop of winter and cool breeze of spring ,souls
with ambitions of overcoming all
adversities and sticking to who we are and where we belong ....SOULS THAT KNEW
THAT NO MATTER HOW HARD A DAY MIGHT BE,ULTIMATELY IT WOULD ALL GO AWAY ONCE WE
ENTER OUR HOMES…Till next dawn yields another life…
